Is there really anyone out there that is able to completely relinquish control to all aspects of their lives?? I like to think that I am fairly easy going, that I can roll with the punches, trust in the universe and follow up of synchronicity and opportunities. BUT there are moments (sometimes many moments I hate to admit) that I just want to control and change and fix and have MY WAY as I think it should be.
For me a prime example is my never ending 'battle' with my weight and the utter frustration I feel at not being able to just 'fix' myself and have the body I desire. I have a logical understanding that I am not morbidly obese, I am not at a weight that is dangerous to my health (that I am aware of) but I am overweight in my own view and out of all of the achievements I have made in my life to date, I see my biggest failure to be my current, unacceptable weight. I have always been someone that 'makes' things happen for myself - I wanted to change careers so I in found a way to study while my children were small that fitted with my life but took me to my goal, generally if I don't like something my life, I change it but to my great and utter dismay, no matter what I try to do to change my weight (or perhaps my opinion of my appearance and current weight) it does not seem to change.
This leads me back to my initial question of control - it is my belief that the harder you push against something, the harder it pushes back and so to this end it would make sense for me to stop trying to 'force' my weight down but rather 'release' it to the universe or the Gods of Karmic weight loss or anyone that would be willing to take it from me really!
The problem that I have is the utter fear that if I just relax for a moment, just try to 'surrender and release' then I will instantly blow up like the Auntie on the Harry Potter movie like a big balloon and absolute disaster and anarchy will reign throughout my body (are you getting the idea that I may be a little hung up on this issue?)
Even as I think about this and type the words onto the screen, I realise how much power and control I am giving to what is really such a small part of who I am but once that little control monster gets hold of you it is just so hard to let it go.....
Wednesday, 14 March 2012
Friday, 9 March 2012
The True Power of Forgiveness
Forgiveness........What does sort of feelings does that word conjure in you? What beliefs do you hold around forgiveness? Do you see it as power or weakness?
In spiritual circles (at least the ones I travel in) forgiveness is a word that is well shared and talked about but I sometimes wonder how well it is 'walked'. I have come to realise, even though it was something I acknowledged and agreed with, that REAL forgiveness is REALLY about myself.
I have shared 'wisdom' on forgiveness many times with friends and clients alike. I have talked the talk of being forgiving to others, that we are all on our own sacred journey and on our own place on that path and that we need to understand that perception is reality so the way one person perceives an others actions or intent is through their own filter and may not necessarily be the way it was meant by the perpetrator of the action - haven't we all been guilty of confronting someone on a perceived misdeed only to find out we were totally wrong in what we thought was going on???
So back to forgiveness - I truly strive to live my life by my own 'spiritual compass' which for me means doing the best job I can to 'walk my talk' meaning if I am going to tout wisdom about letting go of judgements and letting others be where they are on the path etc then it is my responsibility to live my life by that code and take my own advice (SO much easier said than done!).
This week I felt the need to take a 'soul journey' and run a bath with candles and beautiful oils including a recently acquired 'Journey to the Soul' pack with bath salts and oils. My theory was I would simply lay back, relax, and run with whatever channelled its way through the universe to me. The very first thing that came to my mind was forgiveness. It was a very clear moment of realisation that although I can be quite flowing, free and forgiving of many in my life, some of those that are the closest to me are held under the sharpest scrutiny and the highest of expectations.
I started my forgiveness process with the first incident that came to mind and out loud made the statement "I forgive you for not being able to be the person I want you to be". That may sound very conceited but for me, the anger and resentment that I was holding onto and holding against some very close people was about me wanting something from them that they just did not have to give. In the perfect 20/20 vision of hindsight I can see how utterly ridiculous that seems but in the murky water of day to day life I slipped into a pattern of trying to 'take' what I felt I needed from those closely around me whether they had it to give or not.
But getting back to forgiveness, more and more along the journey I realised that forgiveness set me free, it set me free from anger, resentment and bitterness but it also set me free from fear and a sense of lack that something was missing that I was trying to find in others but was really within myself all the time and forgiving others for not being able to be who I wanted them to be allowed me to see others as well as myself in a new, kinder and more peaceful light.
Forgiveness is not an easy path to choose, there are many injustices in the world that leave so many negative feelings within us but along this recent journey I have truly come to realise and understand that forgiveness in my life is actually not about any other person, it is about giving something back to myself..........
In spiritual circles (at least the ones I travel in) forgiveness is a word that is well shared and talked about but I sometimes wonder how well it is 'walked'. I have come to realise, even though it was something I acknowledged and agreed with, that REAL forgiveness is REALLY about myself.
I have shared 'wisdom' on forgiveness many times with friends and clients alike. I have talked the talk of being forgiving to others, that we are all on our own sacred journey and on our own place on that path and that we need to understand that perception is reality so the way one person perceives an others actions or intent is through their own filter and may not necessarily be the way it was meant by the perpetrator of the action - haven't we all been guilty of confronting someone on a perceived misdeed only to find out we were totally wrong in what we thought was going on???
So back to forgiveness - I truly strive to live my life by my own 'spiritual compass' which for me means doing the best job I can to 'walk my talk' meaning if I am going to tout wisdom about letting go of judgements and letting others be where they are on the path etc then it is my responsibility to live my life by that code and take my own advice (SO much easier said than done!).
This week I felt the need to take a 'soul journey' and run a bath with candles and beautiful oils including a recently acquired 'Journey to the Soul' pack with bath salts and oils. My theory was I would simply lay back, relax, and run with whatever channelled its way through the universe to me. The very first thing that came to my mind was forgiveness. It was a very clear moment of realisation that although I can be quite flowing, free and forgiving of many in my life, some of those that are the closest to me are held under the sharpest scrutiny and the highest of expectations.
I started my forgiveness process with the first incident that came to mind and out loud made the statement "I forgive you for not being able to be the person I want you to be". That may sound very conceited but for me, the anger and resentment that I was holding onto and holding against some very close people was about me wanting something from them that they just did not have to give. In the perfect 20/20 vision of hindsight I can see how utterly ridiculous that seems but in the murky water of day to day life I slipped into a pattern of trying to 'take' what I felt I needed from those closely around me whether they had it to give or not.
But getting back to forgiveness, more and more along the journey I realised that forgiveness set me free, it set me free from anger, resentment and bitterness but it also set me free from fear and a sense of lack that something was missing that I was trying to find in others but was really within myself all the time and forgiving others for not being able to be who I wanted them to be allowed me to see others as well as myself in a new, kinder and more peaceful light.
Forgiveness is not an easy path to choose, there are many injustices in the world that leave so many negative feelings within us but along this recent journey I have truly come to realise and understand that forgiveness in my life is actually not about any other person, it is about giving something back to myself..........
Tuesday, 6 March 2012
The Key To Reality Is Perception
Are you a glass half full or a glass half empty type of person? Answering that question is really a good guideline and metaphor for life (I think!).
Have you ever had a time that you thought something was just terrible until someone changed your point of view and you saw it in a new light?? Everyone has their own perception and that perception is their personal reality.
SO I am now setting myself the daunting task of viewing the world (or at least my world) through rainbow coloured glasses......
For me this means taking the parts of my life that I feel are unfair or too hard etc and flipping my perception to view it in a more positive light. Sounds simple right?! I do understand that this will take some work on my behalf, as much as I'd like to believe that I have a pretty shiny take on my world, the reality is that I get caught in the 'pity party' mode at times and complain to whatever poor soul will listen 'poor me, it is all so hard' and while at the time I may believe that not getting my way is terribly unfair - the reality is that it may really not be all that bad - it is simply my current view that is slightly obscured and bent in the wrong direction.
So, self challenge set, I am going to take my imaginary rainbow coloured glasses and look at the parts of myself and my life that I am less than thrilled with through new, colourful eyes and twist it all around 360 degrees and see what different views I can find until I see it from a perception that I can like.
The only question now is where to begin...............
Have you ever had a time that you thought something was just terrible until someone changed your point of view and you saw it in a new light?? Everyone has their own perception and that perception is their personal reality.
SO I am now setting myself the daunting task of viewing the world (or at least my world) through rainbow coloured glasses......
For me this means taking the parts of my life that I feel are unfair or too hard etc and flipping my perception to view it in a more positive light. Sounds simple right?! I do understand that this will take some work on my behalf, as much as I'd like to believe that I have a pretty shiny take on my world, the reality is that I get caught in the 'pity party' mode at times and complain to whatever poor soul will listen 'poor me, it is all so hard' and while at the time I may believe that not getting my way is terribly unfair - the reality is that it may really not be all that bad - it is simply my current view that is slightly obscured and bent in the wrong direction.
So, self challenge set, I am going to take my imaginary rainbow coloured glasses and look at the parts of myself and my life that I am less than thrilled with through new, colourful eyes and twist it all around 360 degrees and see what different views I can find until I see it from a perception that I can like.
The only question now is where to begin...............
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